You Might Be Just One Person...But To One Person You Might Be The World!

One Person from Steven Kiefer on Vimeo.

Watoto Children's Ministries is a ministry near and dear to my heart. In 1998 and 1999 I went with short term teams from my church in Nashville to Kampala, Uganda to work with Kampala Pentecostal Church to put on a kids camps for these children. Watoto is a children's ministry in which children who's parents have died from AIDS are placed in homes of parents whose children have died of AIDS. Together, in Christ, they form a new family. At Watoto, they are shown the love of Christ, taught about God's word and given an opportunity to eat, sleep and go to school in a safe place. Watoto also rescues child soldiers from nearby villages, rehabilitates them and allows them to be a kid again in the freedom and love of Christ!

Here's a film project acted,filmed, directed and produced by Christians from a church called Oasis Church in California who are supporting Watoto Children's Ministries in Uganda. (The young white guy is a friend of ours from SC.) You can watch the trailor for the film and then there's an option to buy the film if you want to support the Uganda Film Project. The money goes directly to help children in Uganda, Africa this Christmas. The dvd will be mailed directly to your house. Please help support the Uganda Film Project and make a difference in someone's life this Christmas. To view the webiste and order the film, go to http://www.onepersonmovie.org/. And to pause the music on the blog so you can view the movie clip, scroll down and hit pause.

The Forgiveness of God

Sometimes there is just not enough time to get my thoughts together to write a new post. But when I read something that expresses what I know to be true in a much better way than I have or could express it, I will be posting it here. This is an entry from a favorite devotional of mine entitled "My Utmost For His Highest" by Oswald Chambers. It is available online for those of you who would like to read more.

In Him we have . . . the forgiveness of sins . . . —Ephesians 1:7

Beware of the pleasant view of the fatherhood of God: God is so kind and loving that of course He will forgive us. That thought, based solely on emotion, cannot be found anywhere in the New Testament. The only basis on which God can forgive us is the tremendous tragedy of the Cross of Christ. To base our forgiveness on any other ground is unconscious blasphemy. The only ground on which God can forgive our sin and reinstate us to His favor is through the Cross of Christ. There is no other way! Forgiveness, which is so easy for us to accept, cost the agony at Calvary. We should never take the forgiveness of sin, the gift of the Holy Spirit, and our sanctification in simple faith, and then forget the enormous cost to God that made all of this ours.

Forgiveness is the divine miracle of grace. The cost to God was the Cross of Christ. To forgive sin, while remaining a holy God, this price had to be paid. Never accept a view of the fatherhood of God if it blots out the atonement. The revealed truth of God is that without the atonement He cannot forgive— He would contradict His nature if He did. The only way we can be forgiven is by being brought back to God through the atonement of the Cross. God’s forgiveness is possible only in the supernatural realm.

Compared with the miracle of the forgiveness of sin, the experience of sanctification is small. Sanctification is simply the wonderful expression or evidence of the forgiveness of sins in a human life. But the thing that awakens the deepest fountain of gratitude in a human being is that God has forgiven his sin. Paul never got away from this. Once you realize all that it cost God to forgive you, you will be held as in a vise, constrained by the love of God.

Proud to Be an American

So, I stayed up all night Tuesday watching the election returns, yep, went to bed at 3:55 AM still unsure of the outcome although Ohio had just gone Obama. Yesterday I had CNN on all day long- we have CNN International so it's not exactly the same as the version in the States. It is, however, very enlightening. Throughout the campaigns, I have watched "the world's reaction" to the US presidential campaigns and heard all kinds of opinions. I must admit that after awhile I found it all very irritating and just wanted to know more of what Americans were saying about the candidates. After reading the party platforms and considering the issues, I found myself debating with the other American that I live with about who to vote for- based on the moral, ethical convictions that we share about life. But, alas, we were a split ticket family and his guy won.

The thing is, opening oneself up to another requires that we listen and adjust our point of view. Of course, we do not exchange all of our convictions but it's always good to look at the "other side" and try to understand the other's perspective. So, I married a Demoocrat, and I will say that after doing so, I realized that I only voted Republican because I come from a long line of Republicans and I have mainly hung out with Republicans, consequently, I had gone along with the whole Republican ideology because it, apparently, went along with my convictions in other areas such as life and marriage. Being married to him and hearing the opinions of others both here in France around the world, I see the value in their viewpoint and the Biblical basis of it as well in areas such as- a commitment to the poor, to finding solutions for using renewable resources for energy, to healthcare for all in our nation. As an aside, I must say that while living in France, I have been very impressed with the accessibility, efficiency, and quality of the universal healthcare system that they have here.

Yes, we should continue to fight for the unborn, for marriage, and for freedom in America! I don't want our country to become like France who has forgotten God. He is neither considered nor respected in any public arena in France. When I listen to the radio, I hear them sarcastically referring to the "croyant" (believing) Presidential candidates. They absolutley cannot understand why it is important to the American people for the president to be "croyant", because it is absolutely a faux pas to discuss such things here in the public arena. Such "personal beliefs" are considered absolutley irrelevant- thus God has become completely irrelevant in their society. But French Christians are not "conservative" either which also has really annoyed me until I realized that aside from the issues of life and marriage, I really do think that the Democrats are more biblical on most issues. We Republicans are fearful of bigger government because we are afraid that our freedom will be jeopardized. This is a real danger and something that we should fight against. I don't want the freedom of religion or speech, or expression to be cut off thus transforming our culture into a "laique" (nonreligious/ secular) society where God doesn't matter anymore. That is what it has become in France- Muslims can't wear their headcoverings to school, Christians can't wear their crosses. What infringment on personal freedom! And why? So that there can be a completely neutral, nonreligious state. Only, it isn't nonreligious, it's anti-religious. Students are ridiculed if they stand up in class and dare to insinuate that there is a God. Churches are investigated because cults are illegal and anything that is not a lukewarm body of believers is suspect of being a cult. This makes me sad. I am deeply saddened by the families that I know whose children have rejected the faith of their parents probably because it just seems so irrelevant in their world here. It is hard to be a Christian in France. They may be rejected because of their faith, so they are hesitant to speak of it.

So, no, I do not wish that for America or Americans. But we need to realize that the influence that Christians hold in America isn't to be taken for granted and that the conservative right appears to be selfish and anti-Christian to others around the world. Refrains of "Drill, baby, drill" come to mind. The caricature of McCain supporters that I have heard most recently on French radio is that of a racist conservative who thinks it is completely normal to fly the confederate flag and voices his concern only on the topics of "God, guns, and gays". How revolting! Yes, those of you who know me know that my dogs were named Rhett and Scarlett, my parents live on Stonewall Jackson Drive, and our doorbell used to play "Dixie". But I've come a long way, baby!

We are called to be salt and light in our society and to stand for what is right and to fight for justice to be done in our nation- for the unborn, for the poor, for those of other religions that we have welcomed to our land. We are Christians, and God has brought the nations to us, let us bless them and love them and take care of them. Why would we not want to be a nation in which all children and families have healthcare? Why would we not want to ensure that this planet that God has entrusted to us is actually around for our children and that we do not destroy it with industry and pollution and deplete it's nonrenewable resources completely? And why don't we want to address poverty at the government level? That doesn't negate the responsibility of the church, but it does make aid that comes from the church to the poor go that much further in ameliorating their situation. If we want our country to do what is right in protecting the unborn, don't we also want them to do what is right in doing justice to the poor? protecting and preserving the planet and it's resources? Those things are actually explicitly mandated in Scripture!

Although I didn't vote for President elect Obama, I am genuinely happy for our country! This is historic! The first African American president! I watched the tears of prominent and powerful African American leaders in our country. They said that they never thought they would see this day in their lifetime. I can only imagine what it is like to always be in the minority, to always be judged by the color of my skin, and to have fought for the right to be free, to vote, to have equal opportunity and access to education, housing, transportation, everything! Yesterday, I was proud to be an American. The French didn't think we would do it- they didn't think that America was ready for a black president. They thought that we were still stuck in the old ways of white superiority and racism, and I know that some of us still are. But on Tuesday, the majority of Americans decided that race doesn't matter, and they chose who they thought would be the best for the job. We have made a giant leap forward! What a celebration of praise and thanksgiving to God I saw in the Ebenezer Baptist Church where Martin Luther King preached his message of nonviolent resistance! What fulfillment of the dream of a people who have been historically oppressed by their rights being withheld, by the attitudes and actions of others, and by the way our capitalistic society typically works for those who are the "have nots". I am genuinely happy- so happy for the African American community who must feel that finally they have been acknowledged as equally important, equally valued, members of our country who are equally able to contribute and now to have had one of their own chosen by the American people to lead our nation who leads the world!

After many conversations and much listening, I have come to this conclusion, the critique and the concern of the world is on America because we really are that influential in the world. Let us be influential for the good, for peace, for hope for all in our society. Let us be prayerful. Let us pray for the protection of President elect Obama and for God to grant him wisdom in the days ahead and let us pray for America! Let us pray also for France, for our brothers and sisters that are here- that they would find their voice and that this nation would turn back to God.

"Praise be to the name of God for ever and ever; wisdom and power are His. He changes times and seasons; He sets up kings and deposes them. He gives wisdom to the wise and knowledge to the discerning." Daniel 2:20-21

He's Back!

Remember this post? Guess he thinks our garage is a nice shelter from the rain and cold. Isn't he just so cute?! I took SA out to see him and we actually gently touched him. He was slightly bristly but nothing like what I imagine a porcupine would feel like. The poor thing was probably terrified, but I didn't want SA to miss an opportunity to touch a real live hedghog! We went back later to see if he was still there, but he had left- (probably fled for his life!). With great disappointment, SA said, "Where's our hedgehog?" and then went out of the garage, looked under the bushes, and started calling at the top of her voice, "HEDGEHOG!!!!!!!" Needless to say, we haven't seen Mr. Hedgehog since then even though I have inadvertantly left the garage door open a time or two.

Easy As Pie

Did you know that quiche is the pizza of France? I always thought of quiche as a chic French dish. I enjoy eating quiche and salade or quiche and soup at cute, girly tea rooms at home in the US. I even served Quiche Lorraine at my bridesmaid's luncheon, because I like it but also because I thought it looked nice on my pretty, printed menus. So, imagine my surprise when my friend Bernard informed me that Quiche Lorriane is the pizza of France. He explained that it's what they make when they need to prepare something in a hurry and they don't have anything else. There aren't very many ingredients and apparently, everyone usually has them on hand in their kitchens. It's their version of quick, easy food. You can pop into many boulangeries and pick up individual size quiches for lunch, and you can also buy frozen quiches at the store. When I told Bernard that I was interested in learning to "cuisiner a la Francaise"(cook the French way), he asked me if I had mastered the recipe for Quiche Lorraine. Quite honestly, I hadn't. I hadn't found the need to make it myself when they are so many quiches readily available to buy premade. Well, last week I was given fresh eggs from my friend Charity's chickens, so I thought I'd make something besides scrambled eggs since I have completely burned out my family on this easy meal. It actually is pretty easy (especially if you buy the crust like I did), and the whole family liked it!

Here's the recipe:

store bought crust (or you can make your own)
butter (25 g,1 oz)
bacon slices 300 g (10.5 oz) diced- I use lardons since they are already diced
heavy cream 250 ml (1 cup)
eggs 3, lightly beaten
nutmeg to season

Preheat to 200C (400 F). Roll out pastry and fit to a 25cm (10 in) tart tin (or pie pan). Line the pastry shell with a crumpled piece of baking paper and bake for 10 minutes. Remove the paper and bake for another 3-5 minutes until the pastry is just cooked but still very pale. Reduce oven to 180 C (350 F).

Melt the butter in small frying pan and cook the bacon (I use lardons) until golden. Drain on paper towels.

Whisk together the cream and eggs and season with salt, pepper, and nutmeg. Scatter the bacon over the pastry shell and then pour in the egg mixture. Bake for 30 min. or until the filling is set. Leave in the tin for 5 minutes before serving.

Un dimanche autour de la table...

We spent the afternoon with some friends from church on Sunday. They are a lovely family- an older couple, Bernard and Aline, and Marie their daughter with her husband Romiald, and daughters Alice and Louise. We go to a French church and have been greatly enriched by our friendships there. Interacting with them over the years I have been stretched and amazed at how different we are with regard to perspective, language, and culture yet comforted and encouraged that we know the same Savior and are one in Spirit. This week, we decided to get together after church at the last minute, so some of the formalities were skipped- for example, we did not take a gift to the hostess and Danny and Romiald picked up Domino's Pizza and a bottle of Rose for the meal. This was the first time that our friends had tried Domino's pizza, so there were questions about the recipe, the toppings, etc. It was so interesting to eat a meal with French people which was not prepared by someone at the table. The normal course of conversation in which we discuss at length the preparation of the food was cut short (perhaps because I am not well informed of Domino's recipes). However, the courses carried on and the manner in which the meal was served was elegant anyway. It never ceases to amaze me that elegance and grace is just so much a part of them that they cannot help but serve even pizza in this manner! Everyone's plate was served- no every man for himself like it would have been at our house. :) There was a huge green salad with homemade vinaigrette (no store bought dressings for us!) Then after we finished our pizza, there was a beautiful cheese tray with fresh figs to eat with a delicious red wine. Then it was time for coffee and ice cream after which the conversation turned to the contamination of the food supply in France.

I thought that I was so much healthier living over here, but it turns out that the fruits and veggies are genetically modified here too. There are no hormone or antibiotique injections in the meat though. That is a definite plus. But, I learned that they do feed the cattle "torteau" which is basically a little cake made from the leftovers at the septic treatment plant- Quelle horreur! Romiald told about a program he had seen on TV that showed hundreds of square miles of dusty fields in the US where cows were hanging out and being fed by an airplane that flys over and drops the food. This was unthinkable for Aline and Marie who live here in Auvergne with us where there are miles and miles of farmland where cattle roam and eat grass, nourishing themselves naturally. While the girls played in the jardin, we chatted and picked apples to eat from Aline's tree in order to "equilibrer le repas"- balance our meal. Pizza isn't a nutritionally balanced meal, you know. Guess that's why they fed the children first- an alternate meal. SA held out for the Domino's, though. She is a true blue Amercian girl. CG had a "repas bebe" (baby meal) that was in the freezer, but of course it was homemade too. She loved this little puree of carrots, poireaux, and potatoes. I am trying to recreate it for her tonight. Aline claims that the secret is in the carrots. She buys her carrots from a local lady who sells her vegetables at the market in town. They are according to Aline, "pas comme des carrotes horrible industrielle, amer!!!"- translation- not like the horrible industrial carrots that are bitter. She is right, the carrots in the puree were very sweet. I am tempted to go track down her carrot lady if my veggie guy's carrots from our market turn out to be less tasty! I am having difficulty feeding CG lately. She is not impressed with my homemade babyfood efforts and she doesn't like store bought either. What's a girl to do? Well, I am off to peel more carrots and potatoes. Nothing is fast and easy that's good for you, right? As Marie loves to remind me, "Everything is better that is fait maison- homemade."

Birthday Girl

One year ago my precious little Catherine Grace was born.

After contractions all day on the day 24th, D and I packed our bags and headed to the "Clinique de la Chataigneraie" convinced that we would be holding our daughter soon. Alas, I was sent home and told that I was not in "real labor" yet. Well, "the not real labor" continued and "real labor" started at around 4 AM. I was pretty sure that this time it was for real. D, however, was unconvinced and having just taken the day off the day before for the "not real labor," headed off to work at around 7:30. Unbeknownst to him, this is when my contractions were kicking up to notches that required intense prayer and an MP3 player with songs loaded for labor- you are listening to some now, by the way. "Well, here we are, just you and me, Lord, how are we going to do this?" I asked Him. Shortly afterwards, my water broke just as SA was waking up and asking for breakfast. I tried to convince her to do the hula dance with me that I had learned with the sage femme (midwife) in order to manage the pain and work with what was going to happen in my body whether I "worked with it" or not. For once, SA didn't want to dance. .. I found myself on the phone to my friend asking her what it was like when one's water breaks. Assured that I was well on my way to delivering a baby, she promptly instructed me to call D to come home and she rushed over to be with me and SA. To make a long story short, we barely made it to the hospital and CG was born in under an hour. I was actually allowed to reach down and "catch" her as she was born! Then I held her skin to skin for two hours that seemed to pass in 5 minutes. She and I stayed in the hospital for six days- the norm for France plus one day since my milk came in slow. She is my "petite francaise" as she was born in France, has only ever lived in France and is more petite than her sister. We are so thankful for her. I was reminded of these verses today as I was writing.

"You saw me before I was born.
Every day of my life was recorded in your book.
Every moment was laid out
before a single day had passed
How precious are Your thoughts about me, O God!
They are inumerable"

Psalm 139:16-17

10 Things I Love About France and the French Today

1. I love the market that is in our town every Monday morning where I can go and buy fresh everything!

2. I love going to the boulangerie to buy fresh bread!

3. I love that there is a Foire aux Vins (wine fair) at our local grocery store this week!

4. I love that the French know how to cook and that when you have no ideas for dinner, you can just go and buy a new cut of meat to try and ask the butcher what to do with it. He gave me a whole meal plan complete with instructions in about five minutes!

5. I love walking SA to our local preschool and watching her jump and cheer because she is so excited to go to the "school with the belltower".

6. I love chitchatting to the French moms at school each morning and at lunchtime.

7. I love that my husband has this week off and there is school and the garderie for CG tomorrow so that we can go and have coffee together "just us".

8. I love that it is fall and time to cut up the fresh pumpkin from my friend's garden and make soup and chocolate chip pumpkin bread!

9. I love that I live in the region of delicious cheeses!

10. I love it that the French do not treat me like an ignorant foreigner because I have difficulty with their language. They have always been and continue to be kind, patient, and gracious to me.

Recipe for Tranquility

Our most recent trip to Provence was to see the fields of lavender in bloom. I have seen some gorgeous pictures of them, and wanted to see them in person this year. We arrived after the peak of the season, but we still enjoyed visiting Senanque Abbey pictured above. We also went to visit the Lavender Museum where I learned all about the health and therapeutic benefits of lavender. I had no idea that there were so many! It seems that the essential oil is helpful for stress relief, insomnia, irritability, headaches, sinusitis, colds, minor scrapes and burns, and several other things. I am pretty excited about benefitting from this natural remedy!

Six Years and Counting

We are celebrating six years of marriage. We like celebrations that continue, so we celebrated with a trip to Lyon on Saturday where we went biking in a beautiful park/zoo with the girls. Then we hopped a bus to make a special trip to Starbucks! The one in Lyon is the closest one to us, and it is new. SA had a strawberry frappuccino, I had a mocha frappuccino, Danny had a latte and we all split a yummy blueberry muffin. Danny even treated me to a Starbucks Lyon mug and some Kenyan coffee which we have been enjoying the past couple of mornings! Mmmmm!

Yesterday was officially our anniversary, so we enjoyed lunch at a charming auberge in the mountains where we had truffade, a local potato cheese specialty dish which is served with cured ham. The girls were with us, and SA had "poppy" ice cream for dessert! I love that the French make ice cream from my favorite red wild flower! It was a luscious pink color that, of course, ended up all over SA's cute outfit, but I am happy to report that this time I managed to removed the stains!

Last night, after our usual Sunday dinner of scrambled eggs, bacon, toast and champagne, we had a yummy foret noire for dessert! This morning we walked to the market where SA rode the merry go round and we procured our fruits and vegetables along with a prepared chicken and potatoes for lunch. And currently, Danny is busily preparing yellow pepper soup with cilantro puree to have with the steaks and sweet potatoes that we will be enjoying for dinner in the jardin. I am enjoying this nice break fromt he kitchen, the vacation in France, and having my husband home for a change. Life is good, and I am so thankful for my husband who actually enjoys cooking on his vacation!

C'est Trop!

When it rains, it pours. It feels as if we continue to go from one crisis to the next. For me it has been recurrent clogged ducts and mastitis, and for D, increasing pressure at work as he finishes out his assignment and last audit in France. This week we both dealt with a major plumbing problem which we had unsuccessfully tried to fix ourselves for a couple of weeks since we could not get a plumber to come. It was finally resolved this week after we physically worked with the plumber (and the sewage) for SIX hours on Tuesday! Quelle horreur! I will spare you all the gory details because it was pretty stinky and disgusting.

As I write, D has just left to take the car in for service and I am in bed with mastitis. It is the fifth incident of this problem since the beginning of July. Luckily the grandparents are here to help out with SA, because both of us are just about over the edge. We were supposed to leave for a weekend in Provence today but had to postpone it as the car needs service and I am sick. Last week I went to the doctor with similar symptoms after which she prescribed an ultrasound of the breast. Everything was fine by the time I had the ultrasound though and I thought I was home free until Thursday of this week when I came down with all the same symptoms and more. The worst part about it is that many doctors in France are not big proponents of breastfeeding. They recommend it to new mothers but do not really seem to be convinced of its importance after the first three months. Consequently, I have been advised to stop breastfeeding twice by my family doctor and once by a pharmicien simply because I have had some challenges. If I quit everything that was challenging, I certainly would not have been able to live in France for three years! Not only that, it would actually be harmful to stop breastfeeding at this point as it is very important to adequately drain the breast, but the doctors here do not seem to subscribe to this philosophy. Everything that I have read about the problems that I am having, says to absolutely NOT stop breastfeeding and that taking ibuprofen for the pain is absolutely safe for both me and CG. The doctors here do not agree. It seems that these are examples of differences between the mentality of the medical community of the US vs. France.

In addition, it is an example of the frustration of living between two worlds. I love living cross culturally, but in doing so, there is inevitably dissonance between the two cultures. How we deal with this dissonance determines what our experience will be. Taking the get mad approach does not help, but passive acceptance often seems a denial of our own beliefs, opinions, and values. The problem lies in a worldview difference. Worldview encompasses beliefs, opinions, and values. Worldview differences mean that we often assign different values to things. For example, the French value on time and money in the service sector is totally different from the American value of time and money. When entering a store in France it is not unusual to be kept waiting by a clerk who is chatting with a friend on their cell phone or in the store (i.e. time difference), and stores are not open at convenient times for working people to shop at night or on weekends and holidays (i.e. money difference). The value on time and money difference is easily recognizable and not so difficult to adjust to, but after three years, I am continually discovering more and more cultural and therefore worldview differences. Living in a new culture is like peeling an onion; there are always new layers to uncover and discover and assimilate to. This makes living cross culturally fun and exciting but also challenging and sometimes stressful.

Lately life has just been too much to handle when you add the cultural stress to the stress of everyday life. Sickness, plumbing problems and expenses, car problems and expenses, learning how to expand our family in a way in which everyone's needs are met, etc. We would appreciate your prayers.

Summer, Sunflowers, and Sad News

I love summer in France. There is lots of farmland here and every summer we have fields and fields of sunflowers in bloom all around our home, town, and area. It is one of my favorite times of year. I am seeing in person what Monet and Van Gogh painted. It is beautiful! Did you know that sunflowers really do turn to face the sun? It is really impressional to drive past a field of flowers facing one direction in the morning and a different direction later in the evening. So cool. In French they are called "tournesol" because they "turn" toward the "soleil".

Most French people and expats are going on vacation for several weeks at a time this summer, and they are all really surprised to find out that we are staying home for the summer except for a weekend or two. But living here in the French countryside is so beautiful and peaceful. I think I will enjoy it as it looks like it will be our last summer here. I have been processing this information for a few weeks. Although I have been surprised and sad about this development, I am resting in the fact that the Lord has good plans for us and that He is directing our steps even when things don't make sense to me.

Je suis Americaine

(Translation: I am an American.)I have been feeling that this is a loaded statement lately. But, I haven't fully understand why ...until today. I had a conversation with a friend. I told her that I am trying to understand "la mentalite francaise" (French mentality) toward America and Americans. Whoa!!!!!!!!!!! Let's just say that the bottle of wine came out immediately after she left. Wow. This is a friend that I have known for several years now- one of only two French women that were willing to speak English to me when I arrived (even though everyone studies English here and this particular friend didn't graduate from high school- so she probably studied it less than others- all this to say that she has gone out of her way more than others to reach out to me). She and her husband are without a doubt our closest friends in our little town, and they were the first people from our church that befriended us. They have had us in their home at Christmas. She comes to visit me. She is a very good friend. Today, in the context of TV and movies, she made the statement that she is "anti-American". Of course, I was intrigued and automatically wanted to understand what she meant. I learned in cultural training that American culture is like a peach- people generally open up to others quickly but then like a peach pit, it may be hard to reach into the core to discover their real feelings. French culture is like a coconut- hard to pierce. It is harder to form relationships or get in but once you're in, it is easier to reach the core where real feelings are shared. I think I reached the core today. And whoa! I am floored.

I think that I thought (or secretly hoped) when telling someone that I am American, that they felt like- oh, yeah, the good guys, the one all the world admires and wants to be like. Boy, was I wrong! This friend of mine basically told me that she feels bombarded by all of the bad parts of America (excessive sex, violence, etc) on the television and that every night she has the impression that she lives in the streets with drug dealers and crime and terrible murders- CSI, FBI Missing, and all those other crime shows. They are translated in French and played here. She feels that each night when the TV is on, they can barely find anything "not American" to watch and if they can, then it is a French copy of an American crime or reality show. She feels that this is all forced upon her because it is all that is on- there are no good choices of television programming and everything bad is American. How sad. I told her that I concur with her feelings about this type of programming and that I can not watch much on TV in the States either, because it grieves my spirit. She feels that America has influenced the TV and film industry very negatively in France.

And then we started talking politics. Of course, we talked about President Bush. I have never heard any French person that has anything good to say about him. While I realize that the war in Iraq has not gone well (and yes, I know that is an understatement), I still feel that in his heart he was trying to do what he thought to be the right thing. This friend basically feels that President Bush has dragged the name of God through the mud for the whole world to see with his poor decisions and his claim to be a Christian. She says that the term "nouveau nee" (born again) now has very negative connotations as it is connected to George Bush, so negative that new Christians in France need to find another term to use in order to distuinguish themselves as new Christians but not connect themselves with all of the controversy that surrounds Bush and the war in Iraq.

This is not as surprising as some other things that bother my friend about the US. Aside from the violent sex-filled media that we export and the war gone bad, my friend also said that people here feel "menaced" by youth movements in the US like the one where young girls are committing to be virgins until they are married. What? How is this a bad thing? So these girls are standing up for what is right (while protecting themselves from STDs and unwanted pregnancies) and the French feel "menaced"? They feel that in the words of my friend, we, and consequently they, are moving backwards.

France is, according my friend and numerous people I have talked to, always behind the US. Since they attained women's rights later, they feel that this sort of thing is a move backwards, she explained. Why are girls who are choosing to live wisely seen as a threat to them? And why is it a move backwards to do what is right rather than follow society's "do whatever feels good" trend? Why they should feel pressured or threatened by any youth movement in the US, I don't know. I don't understand why what we do seems to affect them so much. Why do they really care so much about our war gone bad? What do they care if girls in the US have decided to come together and stand for purity? Are we that influential in their lives and mentality and culture? I guess the answer is "yes". I guess that is why they feel that they have the right to be so critical of us and everything we do and stand for.

None of this should be a surprise to me after living here for about 3 years, but it just felt like a slap in the face to receive such criticism (even though it wasn't personal) from a friend. It felt personal. It felt like being slapped in the face over and over again for a couple of hours. It felt like she was saying that every "American" thing that has made its way into France and been accepted into the culture here is making things here bad. So, it feels as if everything bad here is, of course, our fault. I can't help but resent this blame game. Obviously we are all responsible for our own choices and if they choose to accept the bad then, how is that our fault? She likened it to the verse in Scripture about the stronger brother causing the weaker brother to stumble. We are "Christian America" and here we are sending all that is bad around the world. Basically my friend feels that America is going downhill fast and pulling everyone here down with them. Alot to think about and decide how to respond to... I didn't realize how much being American is a part of my identity until my defenses began to rise.

Almost There

I feel as if I am almost in sight of the goal that I have been working towards since we moved to France- becoming part of the community. It is odd and different to live on the fringe of society as I have been for the last almost three years- living in a cloud it seems like- of not knowing- not knowing why there is suddenly a carnival in town, why stores are closed at random times, how to work the cell phone, oven, dishwasher, etc (because all the manuals are in French even though we did buy Whirlpool) or use "the system" for benefits that I had no idea existed. The language barrier for me felt dangerous for a long time- like how can one be a responsible parent when one is completely incapable of getting help in an emergency because I wouldn't have been unable to communicate with the emergency officials? And what do those roadsigns mean anyway? I mean really, I am just so thankful that I know the Lord and that I believe in angels, because there were many times before I knew about "priorite a droite" - (a French driving nuance in which certain roads that intersect with the road you are on may have "priority" so that you have to yield even if there is NO stop or yield sign) that I could have been hit by another car whom I failed to yield to.

There has been a "grande" cultural learning curve, and I feel as if I have made progress, by God's grace. Relationally, the couple down the street finally spoke to us the other day and gave SA a bonbon. The last two times I have been to my favorite fresh produce store in town, the cashiers have struck up conversations with me. I mean this never happened before- at that shop. I get the "bisou" from the owners of my favorite gift shop in town, and the pharmacist knows me and talks to me too. Last week SA, CG, and I went to a French storytime. This may not sound like a big deal to you, but I have been looking for a simple storytime to take her to for almost 3 years! Then this week, we went on a little field trip with the kids and moms from the "garderie" or nursery where she goes once a week, and I talked with some of the other moms! I found out that several of the kids that she knows from the nursery will most likely be in her class at preschool next year! I feel as if the clouds are parting and I can almost see the light- maybe I will know people soon and actually get to be a participant in my French community instead of being a recluse. I can't believe it has taken almost three years. Now that I have learned to survive in France, I would like to stay and be able to thrive.

Gelatto- the ice cream of a little girl's dreams...

The theme of our trip to Italy (and all of our trips) is, well, food. We love food. And in Italy the ice cream is especially good! So good that we had some every day! France doesn't really have good ice cream, so it was pretty fun to see these gelatto ice cream shops on every corner in Italy. So creamy- and delicious! And so many flavors! From tiramisu flavored ice cream to vanilla and so many flavors in between. There were definitely more than 31 flavors. Well, SA is partial to strawberry ice cream, so D stood in line for a good 10-15 minutes and got her a cone and each of us a cone as well. She enjoyed about 1/4 of it then accidentally dropped it on the street and burst into tears after which D frantically picked it up, licked it all off for her and gave it back to her! Our friends and I were doubled over in laughter and shock and totally grossed out. What a moment- wish I had it on video- so funny!

En Vacance in Provence!

During the first leg of our vacation, we resided at this lovely hotel which has an excellent chef. This is the only place in France where I absolutely love everything that is set before me on the table! Each night we ordered the "menu du soir" without knowing what it would be and each night we were delighted with a wonderful 3 course meal of simple yet delicious Provencale cuisine including seasonal local produce and accented with the freshest herbs of the region. Each morning we indulged ourselves in a breakfast of coffee and croissants, toast, honey and the freshest homemade fruit jellies seasoned with herbs and spices, all served on the terrace. SA played in the garden and D read her stories under the huge plantain tree in the courtyard. After our brief 2 night stay at Le Berger des Abeilles, we spent a day in Chateau Neuf du Pape where we enjoyed lunch, wine tasting, and visiting the former chateau of the Pope for which the region names its wine!

Y'a Un Herrison Qui Habite Chez Moi

During a visit from a friend last week, I discovered a hedgehog who had made himself at home in my garage. Hedgehogs are really kind of cute which may explain why you can buy chocolate hedgehogs at the boulangerie around here. I always thought they were porcupines, and I thought it very odd that a chocolate covered porcupine would be a kid's treat! In fact, little animated hedgehogs are on signs for garden stores around here and in many children's books and cartoons as well. I just never realized that this animal is something we don't have in North America. Well, one learns something new every day, I guess. It turns out that hedgehogs are great for pest control as they are insectivorous. My friend F. was jealous of my hedgehog and wanted to come and get him for her garden. I told her I would like to keep him around to eat my bugs. The picture above was taken as he was hiding from me in the garage. Poor thing was probably scared to death, but he had made quite a nice little nest out of some of our clutter in the garage. Sadly, I haven't seen him again since we closed the garage door for the night, but I am hoping that he is somewhere in my garden keeping all the bugs away from my house.

As I was trying to think of a title for my hedghog blog, I remembered a song that we listened to and discussed in my French class last summer. It is called, "Y'a Une Fille Qui Habite Chez Moi" and it is about a guy whose bachelor pad is transformed when a girl moves in. Here it is if you are interested in hearing it.

BENABAR : Y'a une fille qui habite chez moi - Taratata
TARATATA N°170 (Tour. 10/03/2005 - Dif. 09/04/2005)

Mots-clés : fille benabar chez moi chanson française habite 170 y a une fille qui habite chez moi une fille habite chez moi y a une fille chez moi

Video de mytaratata

Just Processing

"Une baguette moulee, s'il vous plait." Why is that so hard to understand?

There is a new girl at the boulangerie. I have not hit it off with her yet. She never seems to understand me and, I promise, I am speaking her language! It is like the experience I had at the hospital when CG was born. They have those little intercom things that you have to talk into when you need something or someone. In my case I needed the midwife, so in the midst of my excruciating pain which was a result of their refusal to give me ibuprofen and the barbaric stitches given to me after a brutal tear which wouldn't have happened if I had been given an episiotomy (do I sound bitter?), I very sweetly asked for "une sage femme, s'il vous plait." How many times did I have to repeat myself? Oh, about 5 and then they sent someone down the hall to ask me what I needed. I almost lost it but repeated myself and then began to use dramatics to act out the removal of stitches! Then the girl says, "OOOOH, une sage femme!" Hello! What did I say a thousand times already?! Ok, so this experience occured after 2 years of studying French here and living here and going through an intensive 100 hour French course the summer before I gave birth. All this to say. Work with me.If you don't understand, don't give me that look that says that what I have said is totally incomprehensible. Just listen, will you? And then I am sure that if you really listen, although there is an unmistakable anglophone accent, you will understand because I am speaking your language!

Ok, now that I got that off my chest, let me encourage my American friends as well. When you encounter someone who doesn't speak English well. Don't write them off as an idiot. Don't look at them as if they are from Mars. Just listen a little closer. Make a little more effort. And be patient. A smile and willingness to listen goes a long way!

Guignol's Big Stick

At the market this week I noticed a sign advertising a marionette show that would be held in a "place"(grassy area) this week in our town. I have always been interested in the marionette tradition in France, so I was delighted to find that we would be having a show in our town this week. It seems that marionette shows are a traditional children's activity here and one can find marionette theaters in the parks in Paris, but the last time we tried to take SA to one there, she was too young and not a bit interested. However, this week, in our town, we bought tickets, entered the big red and blue tent, chatted with the local Billomoise and, despite one short power outage, enjoyed the show.

Guignol, the main character of most French marionette shows is funny, but in our local show, he used his big stick to beat up the "voleur" (thief) who had stolen the treasure from Monsieur Beau Soleil. While I was laughing, I noticed SA looking at me in horror with a "Why are we laughing at this?" look on her face. I have taught her not to hit, and here we are laughing at these marionettes doing what I have taught her not to do. The moral of the show for the children was "don't steal" with a type of "Three Stooges" humor, but I am not sure how to explain this type of humor to a three year old. Click on the arrow button above to watch a different "Guignol" skit.

Check out my Slide Show!

Coffee, Tea, and Theology

Our group met again last Friday as usual around my dining room table for our weekly discussion/ Bible study. We are using this book as a springboard for our discussions and the Bible as our foundation. However, it seems that we are always back to square one no matter what our topic- the authority and reliability of Scripture. My presupposition is that the Bible is the infallible Word of God, but these ladies do not necessarily agree, hence a study with the Bible as our foundation does not necessarily seem to work. Though I am thrilled that they would like to explore the Bible, I am continually running into the brick wall of, well, basically, of doubt, because they still doubt that the Bible is really true and really God's Word and not just a "work of fiction by human authors". Thus all of the truth that I am so passionate about sharing and discussing with them is to them very interesting but optional. This is the postmodernist perspective in living color. Is there universal truth? If so, who determines what it is? Why would God only accept one way of coming to Him? What are your conclusions? Yes, it's time for you lurkers to comment! My ladies are reading, and I think they need to hear more than just my responses that they get every week. By the way, you don't have to agree with me to comment, I am opening up a discussion that I hope will continue. Hope to see you in blog land soon!

The Faith of a Child

We found out that a friend of ours (who is 6) has had scarlet fever. So, SA and I prayed for her at bedtime. Immediately after we finished praying, SA turned to me and said, "Is she all better now?" I love that! I was thinking about doctors and antibiotics, etc, but my three year old has a far better perspective with her pure, undiluted trust and faith in God our Father. By the way, our little friend is doing better!

At that time, the disciples came to Jesus and asked, "Who is greatest in the kingdom of heaven?" He called a little child and had him stand among them. And He said, "I tell you the truth, unless you change and become like little children, you will never enter the kingdom of heaven. Therefore, whoever humbles himself like this child is greatest in the kingdom of heaven." Matt. 18:2-4

"Understanding is the reward of faith. Therefore, seek not to understand that you may believe, but believe that you may understand." Saint Augustine

To Market, To Market...

to buy a fresh hen! Actually today it was just fruits, vegetables, and bread! The weather is getting nicer, so we have been enjoying being outdoors. It was not so long ago that I was pushing the double stroller to the market and getting a serious workout. Now SA is walking and running next to the stroller all the way there and back. She says "Bonjour" very cheerfully to the boulangere so she can get a lollipop, and wants to go and visit our friends who have a shop in town after our shopping is completed (and she has visited the park, of course). My, we have come a long way! I remember when we first moved here and she was the baby in the stroller. Now CG is the one I am strolling around town with SA in tow as well.

After 2 and half years, I finally feel as if I really live here. We ran into several acquaintances at the market today with whom I chatted. I remember the days when I was so proud just to be able to ask for the bread that I wanted at the boulangerie and get the fruits and vegetables I needed from my veggie guy. Now that I know the shopkeepers around town and am "known" as well- probably as that strange American mom that can't speak French very well, but hey, at least she makes an effort, I feel that I am actually making progress in becoming part of the community. That is after all, an objective that I have had since we moved out from the city "a la compagne" (to the country). I am still working my way to integration- slowly but surely!

Snowy Easter

We woke up this morning to beautiful white snowflakes falling outside. Since it hasn't been that cold lately, the snow didn't stay on the ground, but it was pretty while it was falling. Easter is always very different here- no Easter lillies or dressing up in a new "Easter dress" like in the southern US. Now those could be considered random cultural traditions without much meaning, but I must say that I enjoy them. It seems strange and sad to me how we had NO mention of Easter at our church today or for the last 2 years at Christmas or Easter- except when everyone leaves and we all say, "Bonne Fete"- i.e. "Have a great party!" So my friend said that we are just trying to be non Catholic about it since every Sunday is really a celebration of the resurrection of Christ. But, I still think it strange- not even one mention or "He is Risen" proclamation. Oh, well, I don't understand alot of things around here. Tomorrow is the real public holiday so I guess all the stores will be closed. Seems like D is always out of town on those days- days that we would have together were he in town- bummer. He left today for Thailand and will be away for 3 weeks this time. So... you could be hearing from me more- in my attempt to stay connected to the outside world and all.

"Why are you cast down, O my soul? And why are you disquieted within me? Hope in God; For I shall yet praise Him, the help of my countenance and my God." Ps. 43:5

My Big Girl

...is three years old! We had a ballerina/ princess party last week to celebrate and have much to report since then. She is drinking out of a big girl cup now (as opposed to a sippy cup), sitting in a big girl chair at the table, and (drum roll) wearing big girl panties! Here's a picture after her return from the garderie this week where she painted, and played, all in French! The most wonderful and challenging transition, of course, has been her transition to big sisterhood,but I have been encouraged this week as I have watched her playing with CG. The two of them giggling together melts my heart! We have been learning Genesis 12:2 together, "I will bless you...and you shall be a blessing." When we talked about all of the blessings that God has given us and drew a picture to illustrate them, SA wanted to draw a picture of her little sister, CG!

Somewhere Over the Rainbow

The Auvergne is a region known for its exceptional natural environment: a rugged landscape of mountain ranges and volcanoes, and lakes and springs in the heart of France. Because of the volcanic nature of the region, it is very hilly, and it seems that the cloud formations over the valleys are very conducive to the formation of rainbows. To put it bluntly, I have never seen so many beautiful rainbows so frequently in all my life! Whenever I see one, I am reminded of the Creator who cares so deeply for His creation. Yesterday while driving into town, I saw a gorgeous rainbow arching over the city of Clermont- Ferrand. It was such a special reminder to me of God's love and faithfulness to me personally. The above photo was taken from my back window last spring.

"Hear my cry, O God; listen to my prayer. From the ends of the earth I call to you, I call as my heart grows faint; lead me to the rock that is higher than I." Ps. 61:1

"Find rest, O my soul, in God alone, my hope comes from Him. He alone is my rock and my salvation...My salvation and my honor depend on God, He is my mighty rock, my refuge. Trust in Him at all times, O people; pour out your hearts to Him, for God is our refuge." Ps. 62:5-8

It Takes A Village

Hilary is right about this one. We need each other. Raising children while maintaining one's sanity is not a walk in the park! With D in the Czech Republic last week and in Germany this week, I have been in need of help, and I have had it. We expat mamas know how to lean into each other and help each other. Without family closeby, we really have to depend on each other. Last week I needed help taking my car in to the garage and picking it up, and this week I have needed help as all of us girls have been under the weather but in need of groceries and party supplies as SA is turning 3 on Sunday. F (she's French but has adopted us expat mamas!) came by on Tuesday and stayed with the girls while I jetted out to get groceries, and today I had several offers for help if I needed it. Thankfully, we are now recovering and were able to get out today. Running is another outlet that provides mental sanity, and lately we have been figuring out ways to help each other in that arena as well. I am so thankful for my "village" lately!

Savon de Marseilles

This type is seemingly considered the "only real" soap in France. It's traditionally made with olive or palm oil and is great for the skin. There are bars, and liquid bath gels touting the "Savon de Marseilles" name, and I have always kind of wondered what makes this soap so great to the French. It is almost like in America when we say "Kleenex" to refer to any paper product that we use for our noses. The word "savon" is soap, but so often you hear people refer to "le savon de Marseilles" and I always see it written on bottles of laundry detergent and such. When I was in the hospital after having CG, I was slightly taken aback when there was no hygeine recommendation for after childbirth other than washing with "savon de Marseilles"! Last week after having some French friends for lunch, I learned that I should be using it to scrub my dishes with! I had no idea! I thought it was just for bathing and in detergents. Apparently it is the only thing that can really get anything clean by French standards. Here's where you can learn more...http://www.marseillesoap.com/

Desperate Times and Desperate Measures

When we first moved to France, I was lost on the baby aisle of the grocery store and at the pharmacy. There are so many different products for changing diapers here that I still haven't figured out exactly what product is for what! Wipes are like the really modern convenience way to change a diaper, but most people use pulled cotton with water instead of wipes and a product like "lait de toilette", "savon de toilette" or "eau de rincage" with a "gant de toilette" (wash glove). Fortunately for me, they do have Pampers and Huggies products, so I have always been able to buy wipes and change my babies the "American way"- until today...

Today I scored a spot at the local garderie for SA. The garderie in our town is a sort of "Mother's Day Out" solution for me that's conveniently located in the all cobblestone "pedestrian only" medieval district of our town. When CG was a newborn, I was slightly worried that she might have shaken baby syndrome after riding to the garderie in her stroller. :) No, seriously, it took a long time for me to become comfortable with leaving SA there, and she still doesn't go on a regular basis as there is not alot of availability for us, but when she goes, it is so nice to have a little break! Desperate times call for desperate measures sometimes. I am learning to accept the choices that I have here and trust God in them instead of always longing for the choices that I would have if we were at home in the States.

Anyway, she went to the garderie today and I had a morning to do errands that I couldn't easily have done with her. When I went back to get her, she had eaten lunch and played and had a great time. Just before leaving, she told me that she needed to go to the potty. Currently she still wears a pull up and we are continuing to work on potty training. Upon taking her to the bathroom, I discovered that she had a dirty diaper after I had pulled it down her legs! CG was strapped to me in the baby carrier and I had a couple of diapers for SA but no wipes. I send the pull ups with her, but I don't send wipes as they have told me before that they use "the gant". So, I had to learn on the spot the French way of changing a diaper. The Directrice kindly offered to hold CG, and I tried my best with just toilet paper, but, well, it just wasn't doing the trick. After trying my best to no avail, I had to ask for the use of their diaper changing facility.

Now, I have changed CG's dipaers the French way, but as you mothers know, that is a whole different ballgame than changing the diapers of an almost 3 year old. So I had to ask for directions from this woman and then use the pulled cotton, the "savon de toilette", and the gant (wash glove) and tap water. It was an experience that I would not care to have again, thank you! Can you imagine how much yucky laundry that would create? I guess that is the way our grandmothers had to do it too, but let me just say, I am so thankful for disposable diapers and wipes!

Fait a la Maison

Ok, you have heard it again and again, but let me reiterate, food is a very serious thing for the French. It is one thing I love about them,but it drives me crazy at the same time. I love that both the preparation and the ritual of a meal are seriously important to them. We sit for hours (literally) at the table together and a large part of that time is spent discussing the food. I love the time factor because you really get to know people by hanging out for that long around a table with them. And as for the conversation, I am very interested, but I sometimes wonder if we are talking this much about the food because they are French and that is what they do or if it is because we are American and they think we are clueless about cooking and healthy eating. We have some wonderful French friends who have invited us to their homes for meals, and I so love going and getting to know them and experiencing their culture with them as opposed to observing it as a tourist or expat from afar. However, I do get tired of the stereotype that most of the French do seem to have about Americans and our eating habits. It is almost ingrained into them by the media here- that we (Americans) are all fat, unhealthy eaters. I mean I actually had a lady at the lab in my town remark as she was doing one of my monthly pregnancy blood tests, that we (Americans) don't eat "crudites", i.e. raw vegetables. My blood pressure shot straight up, I am sure, as I denied this ridiuculous statement. Of course we eat vegetables! Of course we eat raw vegetables! Salad anyone?

Anyway, when you watch TV or listen to the radio in France, it doesn't take long to realize that the French are deathly afraid of becoming like America with our fast food society and large percentage of obese people. On the news, they are sure to show large numbers of grossly overweight Americans while warning of this growing epidemic in France. I mean really, we discussed this on a number of occaions in my summer French class, and it got so old (especially since I was the only American and had put on quite a bit of weight during the pregnancy). Then there is this publicity campaign on TV that encourages everyone to eat 5 fruits and vegetables every day. I have actually had people explain this to me as if they thought I have never considered this option or realized that eating fruits and vegetables every day is a healthy way for me to live personally. I can assure you that this assumption did not come from observing my lifestyle. It is because I am American, and they understand us to be Neanderthals about what we put into our bodies. Well, I admit that I do go back and forth in my interactions with them- sometimes trying to prove them wrong and convince them that some of us do actually have a healthy diet and sometimes just throwing up my hands unwilling to compete with them in their food fanaticism.

So the other day I had my friend and her 2 girls over for "gouter" (afternoon snack). This is a daily event for French children and some adults as well. So, living here, I have adopted this part of the culture for SA. It's easy to have friends for gouter (especially French ones) as I don't have to prepare a whole meal and be worried about whether or not we do it the American way or the French way with all the courses, etc. Gouter usually consists of something sweet and some fruit for the children. So, I made my grandmother's fudge pie and served it with vanilla ice cream just as she recommended on the recipe card that she wrote for me years ago. Then I saw strawberries at the grocery store for less than a euro! I thought they would be a nice accompaniment to the chocolate, et voila, our gouter!

Well, this is very American thinking! The French are very seasonal eaters. My friend commented that she usually only eats "la glace" (ice cream) beginning in spring and summer and that she had never thought of eating it in winter. So, I am laughing to myself as I bring out the strawberries! These are, of course, a spring/summer fruit. In France, where the food comes from is VERY important. The law requires all food vendors to post where the food they are selling was grown. So, I knew that these strawberries were from Spain. Last summer I had a couple of hilarious conversations with different French visitors in my home about where the strawberries came from, and gathered that, generally, the French strawberries are better than the Spanish ones in my friends' opinions. On this occasion, my friend pointed out that as the weather in Spain is not yet warm enough to naturally grow strawberries, it is probable that artificial means were used to cause these strawberries to grow. Well, I quickly comforted my friend by telling her that she need not feel obligated to eat these suspicious strawberries. My friend politely dismissed my concern but later told her daughter not to eat any more strawberries as they would eat them in the spring. :)

The conversation around the pie was also humorous as we discussed it in French. I called it a fudge "tarte" as I understand that the French "tarte" is most comparable to an American "pie" and then attempted to describe what fudge is to my curious friend. Of course then there was a debate about whether it was a "tarte" or a "gateau" (cake) and my friend explained that normally a "tarte" has a "pate" (crust). I acknowledged that usually American pies have crusts as well but this pie is exceptional as it is "sans pate" (without a crust). After this exhausting discussion in defense of my grandmother's fudge pie, my friend asked me if I make a "gateau" (yes, she used the word gateau!) every day. I told her "no" and probably appeared a little puzzled after which she told me that she has friends that do.
"Why?" I asked incredulous at the thought of making a cake from scratch every day. She responded by explaining that her friend wants to know exactly what is in the gouter that she gives her child every day. She wants it to be "fait a la maison" (homeade). And so it continues, the perpetual culture clash in my brain- an American vs. a French perspective on everyday eating.

Mission Organization- Is it possible?

I need serious organizational help! My life is spinning out of control. CG is 4 months old and I still haven't gotten into a groove. I find that the more structured time that I have, the more I accomplish. When left to myself with nothing planned, I am a disorganized mess. With no more French classes, I am leaning in the disorganized mess direction. Also don't babies change their schedules all the time just when you think maybe you have finally got it? Anyway, if I try to impose a little scheduling, I don't even know what would work best- the same wake time or staggered? same nap time or staggered? bedtimes? With D gone, there is that extra challenge with the bed bath routine as he helps alot when he is here.

Also, I can't find anything. I think that organizational genes are missing in my brain. I really would like to have a desk, of my own. Not shared space that someone else gets into but my very own space where I can set up a system that works for me. Instead I share the computer table with you know who and have a couple of baskets for my stuff next to the printer. This is not working. D has taken the desk as he is the one that does the finances- except when he's out of town, and then we have big problems because I usually act like the ostrich with my head in the sand and it has to come to the surface when he's not around. Then I am in a panic because I have no idea what my PIN number was in the US or how to access our US or French account online. This is not good. I was looking around at organizer people's blogs the other day and became very discouraged because that is just not me. I can't seem to get my act together enough to have things go smoothly. I so would like to get a schedule and stick to it, but I can't seem to figure that out. And exercise! How in the world can I fit that in with 2 children and already not enough personal time in the morning? So you mothers of more than one, and wives who work well with your husbands in managing your finances and your lives, how do you do it? I really would like to know...how to organize my time, and stuff, and get things done with 2 children at home with me.

Super Tuesday

D is in Mexico for two weeks, so I am finding myself with more time on my hands. I hate for him to be gone. It is as if there is a major piece of our family missing. Nothing is the same without him. The rhythm of our lives is totally disturbed, but in the extra time that I have, I am trying to find productive ways to spend it. I always feel a little extra pressure to be productive while he is gone which is strange- but I always envision accomplishing lots of things in his absence. Like what? you ask- like organizing and cleaning and reading and developing and organizing photos. I know, I am in serious need of a life. It really hit me today how detached from the rest of the world I am. I just found out from CNN that I could have voted today if I had known earlier. So, I go on, still detached in this little French town in the middle of the sticks. It's kind of cute in the spring, summer, and fall but a bit depressing in winter especially with D gone. SA, CG, and I went to a new park today to try to find some ducks to feed. I even bought the ducks fresh bread from the boulangerie, but there were no ducks. We saw a couple flying away, but no takers on the baguette. Oh, well, I think I may have found a nice place to run with the girls in a double jogger if I can scare one up. Maybe I'll lose like 1o pounds while D is gone. That would be really impressive!

The View

Fridays are always very reflective for me as I host our coffee talk/ Bible study group in the mornings. Have you ever watched the show "The View"? We are kind of like that group in that our conversations go from one end of the spectrum to another. Prayer was my attempt to open the study but inevitably the conversation drifted to "shamanism" and how Ezekiel's visions could have been from hallucinogenic mushrooms. After discussing this, we then turned our conversation back to our study questions and the Old Testament prophetic books which was actually our topic for the day. We are 4 American mothers but we are all from different parts of the US and come from different church backgrounds. Suffice it to say that we all have different views of the world and this makes our time together both rich and exciting although sometimes a little confusing and challenging. We do not all agree on the inspiration of or inerrancy of Scripture which is the biggest challenge for me as the leader, but we press on with our "Knowing the Bible 101" study anyway. This week we are looking at the Gospels in our overview of the Bible. I am praying that our hearts are captured by who Jesus is and how He can change our lives today! I have a new favorite song from a cd I got for Christmas. I think that the lyrics are just so visual and profound. The song is entitled "Because You Are" and it is about our topic for this next week.

Infinite Deity, humbly enframed
In a mortal, breakable body you came
To rescue our souls from the depths they were in
Because of, in spite of, to cover my sin

Master and servant, together in one
Come to redeem what our hearts had undone
Savior of all come to gather His kin
Because of, in spite of, to cover my sin

Holy, unbreakable infinite God
Ever unchanging in all that You are
Light of the world and the sun and the stars, You are I Am and I am because You are

Shepherd and pastor to wandering sheep
Gave up His life so our own we could keep
Soldier in battle for souls He might win
Becasue of, in spite of, to cover my sin

Holy unbreakable infinite God, ever unchanging in all that You are
Light of the world and the sun and the stars
You are I Am and I am because You are

Humbly forsaking His heavenly seat
Beaten and bloodied and washing my feet
Opened our eyes to what love really means
The blood on my hands is what washes me clean

Holy, unbreakable, infinite God
Ever unchanging in all that You are
Light of the world and the sun and the stars
You are I AM and I am because You are

Four Months Old!

I can't believe she's already 4 months old! Is she not the sweetest thing you have ever seen? Yes, I am looking for some comments here. :)

Point of Grace - How You Live

In our "coffee talk"/ Bible group on Friday mornings, we have been talking lately about how there is a tendency for us as American women to value ourselves based on the things that we do. This is a real downer when one doesn't leave the house for a couple of days at a time and the activities within the house are mainly cooking, cleaning, changing diapers, and potty training. As expat, stay at home moms, we sometimes find ourselves asking ourselves, "What the heck are we doing here?" And although we believe that we are making an eternal investment in the lives of our children, sometimes the daily grind does seem meaningless and we find ourselves asking, "How are we really contributing?" We read the book of Ecclesiastes this week and discussed Solomon's reflections on life and meaning. At the end of his life, he recognized that enjoyment and satisfaction in life are a gift from God but acknowledged that it is also meaningless and lacks fulfillment apart from God. This song is about embracing life and although when I first heard it, I thought it just catchy and kind of faith hillish, it really does speak to our coffee talk discussions on life lately. The theme is embracing what God has given us to enjoy in the here and now (even though we may not know what is next). I love the line that says, "Make peace with God and peace with yourself, because in the end there's nobody else." At the end of our lives it is just us and God, so I want to be able to say that I lived my life fully, and I believe that we can only experience true fulfillment in life through Jesus who came to make peace between us and God. Hope you enjoy the video!

Arachnaphobia

I am absolutley, thoroughly, and totally disgusted! Also, I'm freaking out. It seems that one of the big huge nasty spiders survived my two attempts to spray him to death in the attic/ closet that is right next to CG's room. He also survived the spray across the doorway and around the door that is supposed to keep him from entering the habitable part of the house not to mention the gas bomb that I used this week! He decided that a fun trick would be to climb into the clothes hamper and surprise me today. After I grabbed a new, only worn once onsie off of the top of the pile to wipe off CG's mouth while I was changing her on the changing table and replaced it, I saw him. Right there. Big, black, ugly and right on top of CG's cute little pink sweater! So close to the changing table and her bed. I screamed and jumped and grabbed her and ran. Now every time I feel a tickle on my foot, I am jumping. Is this behavior normal? I would not say that I have a huge fear of spiders. I just hate them! And the thought of them in my house is really hard to take. What is it with this house and my life? Lately I feel like I am living in a horror movie!

Mama Don't Play!

Ok, no more fun and games, I have pulled out the big daddy weapons! My oldest baby has been bitten again in her room and this mama got angry. When it comes to fleas, mama don't play! Do you like the latestin extermination fashion? Just call me the flea terminator.

My friend, Dig, kindly took SA for me for the day so that I could prepare the house for the second bombing. This took longer than I had anticipated. After clearing up the clutter so that the gas would be sure to reach every flea or flea-to-be, I had to remove all foodstuffs and appliances from the kitchen counter, tape shut all of the cabinets in the kitchen, remove the plants, and thoroughly vacuum the whole house (yes, again). I also had to open all of the drawers in order to expose all of the linens and SA's clothes to the gas (great, more laundry). Hope that we have a flea free home soon. Time to vacuum again and mop and continue washing. I hope we are finished with this problem. I am sending out the rugs to be cleaned and spraying the carpet that remains.

Lately I have been worn slap out by a string of seemingly unsolvable problems like: the toilet leak and the plumbers that would never call back or come, the mildew that has reappeared on the walls that was already removed and the unreachable landlord who doesn't seem to care, the car that needs repairs, and yes, the flea infestation. Anyway, we are not promised a problem free life, but I am thankful that we have a God who is with us in the midst of life's challenges. Yesterday as I drove away from my "just bombed" house, I saw a beautiful rainbow. I guess that was His way of reminding me that He knows, He cares, and that He does keep His promises to us. The promise that is meaningful to me today is this:

"I will rescue those who love me. I will protect those who trust in my Name. When they call on me, I will answer; I will be with them in trouble. I will rescue them and honor them. I will satisfy them with a long life and give them my salvation."
Psalm 91:14-16

Toddler's Tour of Paris and Back to Reality

Paris was a nice change of pace. We really enjoyed travelling by train as we had a compartment to ourselves, could move around a bit, and I was able to nurse the baby! We had an apartment style hotel which worked out really well as D and I slept on the sleeper sofa and the girls took the bedroom. We had a kitchen which was wonderful, and the hotel was situated right next to a mall with a grocery store in it and a Haagen Daas store! After getting the girls fed and settled down for the night, we were able to eat take-out (KFC one night and Chinese the next)! This may not sound like a treat to ya'll, but it was for me!

In town I decided to go with the baby carrier and one lightweight travel stroller. This didn't work that well at the Musee D'Orsay, but at least I got to walk by Van Gogh's, Monet's, Renoir's, and Degas's paintings even if I didn't get to really look at them for long. SA was over the edge after our embassy appointment, long lunch (not long by choice), and after we finally kicked her out of the stroller so CG could have a nap. D kept asking me if I was "soaking it all in", but it was hard to thoroughly "soak in" Paris when one is worrying about babies in the wind and rain along busy streets and being smushed like a sardine on the Metro with my 3 mo. old strapped onto my body. The "big "ole clock" at D"Orsay and the "big 'ole wheel" were the highlights of the trip for SA. The large ferris wheel was located in the center of the city next to the Jardin des Tuileries and near the Arc de Triomphe, the Eiffel Tower, and the Champs-Elysees. We had a lovely view of the city although it was a bit windy and chilly.

We did a little shopping (one kids' store) and never made it to Starbucks, but we had a nice mexican/ french style lunch on Saturday. I had a great margarita! There is only one mexican restaurant where we live, so it was good to get my fix of mexican food before heading back home to the boon-docks of France. We finally gave up on the Metro again as it took too long with SA insisting that she climb up and down all the stairs and having to carry the stroller with CG in it (we gave up on the carrier too). Taxis are more expensive but alot easier- especially when there is luggage involved. It was a short trip but probably as much as this stress case mama can handle right now anyway.

Sunday morning as we were getting ready for church, SA turned up with 6 more flea bites on her back. This morning she had 4 more. Yesterday, I spent the day taking the car to be repaired, waiting for the plumber again (but this time he did come!),and shopping for flea bombs and formulating a plan. I will have to bomb the whole house this time and then wash all the linens in the house and SA's clothes again. I hope that will be the end of every flea, flea egg, and flea larvae and pupa. But we will see...

We're Off to Paris!

I am so excited! We're off to Paris tomorrow! We have to go to the Embassy to get CG's certificate of birth abroad and apply for her passport. We could have gone to Lyon for this, but why pass up an opportunity to go to Paris? D is excited about going to Starbucks. I am excited about seeing the Musee Dorsay and shopping! SA is excited about riding the train!

My challenge for today is to figure out just how to get around one of the greatest cities ever. It is a challenge because there are so many options, but which one would be the best? Baby carrier and a stroller? 2 strollers? Double stroller? Stroller and a boogie board attachment? Stroller and a snap and go? We have lots of second hand baby equipment from friends- a double stroller which is like driving a bus- I am not too keen on taking this as Paris is VERY handicap inaccessible. I also have 4 baby carriers none of which I have had great success with thus far. Hmmm, I am just not sure what would be best. The good thing is that we know that the Metro is very hard to navigate with a stroller. I really prefer knowing what the challenge is ahead of time instead of being taken totally off guard by expecting American accessibilty where it is unavailable. The other good thing is that SA can walk now. However, just because she can walk does not mean that she is totally in control when she does, and I do think that both she and I need an option for her to sit. We have this great Combi stroller which has a tri-fold system and a shoulder strap- we could just fold it up and walk down the flight of stairs into the Metro and then carry it through a turnstyle. Last time we just gave up and walked for miles as it just seemed too hard to get on and off the Metro and the buses with her and the stroller and all of our stuff. This time we will need to ride more if she is going to have to walk and if one of us is carrying CG. I am just not sure of the best mobility solution. I guess I want one that will be easy and enable us to enjoy the city, but as one French lady told me at the laundry mat the other day, "La vie n'est pas simple." ("Life is not simple.") My response to her, "Jamais, jamais" ("Never, never").

After washing everything (for the second time)in my flea ridden house in a washer that is one third the size of the washers in the US and a dryer of the same size that has a condenser that needs to be dumped out about every hour, vacuuming more times than I can count with a second hand vacuum cleaner that is not the best, and finally bombing the suspect areas because nothing else seemed to work, I spent the day at the laundry mat with SA's bed linens on Monday only to find out this morning that she has wet them all! I need a break! Hopefully we will have a wonderful weekend in Paris... I just need to wait until after the plumber comes to fix the leaking toilet, then hopefully I can get out to buy my Paris travel necessities. This mobility thing with 2 kids is still difficult- yesterday I didn't make it out of the house until noon even though I was getting ready all morning. And then I returned empty handed at 4:00 because I couldn't think clearly or make a decision while shopping with both girls. I've got to get better at this!

Ready, Set, Go!

The French celebrate Christmas with a huge meal that lasts for hours and concludes with gift opening after Pere Noel (Santa Claus) comes around midnight. As you can imagine, navigating this situation with 2 small children could prove difficult. In our case it was near disastrous as SA was a sobbing mess throughout the evening. Hindsight is 20/20, and I have lots of advice for myself after the fact, but I guess we all have to live and learn. After accepting the invitation to our friends' house for the "Reveillon" (Christmas Eve), I learned that we would be out until after midnight and being the plan ahead mom that I try to be, I purchased an inflatable sleeping bag for SA. The problem was that I had planned to put her down after dinner. I knew that dinner would be served late, but I mistakenly thought that SA would be able to make it through dinner. I'll skip most of the details, but let's just suffice it to say that the main course was served at midnight after we had had the champagne with amuse bouche and entree (i.e. appetizers) of raw salmon, shrimp, oysters, and foie gras!

I had told SA that we were going to be having chicken, so she wanted to stay up to eat chicken. We were actually served "chapon" which is a very special, expensive, festive, castrated rooster. This rooster was served with stuffing made from all of the rooster entrails and ground pork (this was SA's favorite part of the meal) and roasted chestnuts. Then, we had a visit from Santa Claus, and all of the presents appeared under the tree. We all exchanged gifts and then went back to the table for dessert. By now it was between 2 or 3 in the morning and I was so exhausted that I didn't want to taste my own pumpkin pie although I explained the recipe to our curious friends.

We have such precious French friends here. They are so generous and open to us and I am so thankful to have these dear brothers and sisters in our lives. I only regret that I am not able to communicate with them better so that I could express my appreciation to them. Instead I feel that I am always making linguistic and cultural blunders which could be construed as rudeness while at the same time dealing with a tempestuous toddler. Thank goodness for grace!

After going to bed after 4AM, I was ruined for the day of the 25th. I had invited friends for coffee in the afternoon thinking that we would be finished with our Christmas morning festivities by then. I was wrong, and I didn't have time to bake the birthday cake for Jesus that I usually have on Christmas day. Fortunately, my sweet friend, F,(the one that helps me with my French and cherry picking) brought the "buche de Noel" (traditional "yule log" cake) that she made for her family and shared it with us. After visiting with our friends in the afternoon, I was again exhausted. So, the Branyons celebrated Christmas, American style, on the 26th this year.