AIRPLANES AND MIND GAMES


We have been back in France about a week now, and I finally feel like SA is back on schedule and we are both over our jet lag. This flight home to France was a killer as Little Miss Toddler did not sleep a wink on the plane. Instead she threw a tantrum in the middle of what was supposed to be the night. The flight attendant had to come and sing French baby songs and do the hand motions to calm her. I had a lady offer to walk her around the plane "for everyone else's sake"- How Rude! Another lady said loudly,"Give her Benadryl". If she only knew that I tried to give her Benadryl to no avail on the flight to the US. It only seemed to make her more excited. This trip was definitely marked by jetlag on both ends more than we have experienced before. On each of the 3 airplanes that we flew back to France on, picture D heavy-laden with an overstuffed backpack full of books and stuff that wouldn't fit in our overweight luggage and a large Britax carseat lumbering onto the plane in order to install seating for our little princess. Then picture me a few people behind him with the baby and diaper bag in one arm, my purse on my back and the cat in a carrier in the other arm meowing all the way to our seats. Who would want to sit near us?

Anyway, the flights were not uneventful. Let me leave it at that. To top it all off, two days after we arrived in the US, the "UK Transatlantic flights to the US" bomb scare took place. After having just flown from Charles De Gaulle in Paris to JFK in New York a couple of days earlier, I was really rattled to hear of this news. Then the day after we arrived back in France, the Delta Comair flight crashed. We had just flown Comair to Cincinatti, so news of that crash was quite rattling as well. Actually, I have noticed that since becoming a mother I have been alot more susceptible to fear and worry than I ever was previously. I know that concern over the safety of one's children is natural, but I am talking about more than concern. I am talking about worry and fear.

As Christians, we are commanded, "Do not fret (i.e. worry)- it only causes harm" (Ps. 37:8). So even though worry is natural for mothers, we are not supposed to worry? Oh, yeah, we are supposed to be living in the supernatural power of the Holy Spirit aren't we? Well, let's be honest, lately, I haven't been. But I am getting into the Word to get back on track. How are we to control something that is so natural like worry? How do we stop conscientious parenting from turning into fear of all of the "What ifs?" The prescription for worry that is given to us in Ps. 37 by David is the command to "trust" in verses 3 and 5. Do I trust the Lord? That is the bottom line question. Do I trust Him with the life of my child? Can I trust Him in every circumstance- even in times of terrorism and violence against children? If I believe that He is good and trustworthy, if I have put my faith in Him for the salvation of my soul, then I have no choice but to say yes, I can trust Him. I must trust Him. By faith, not according to my own feelings, I say that I will trust Him. Then for me, the Lord has shown me that step number 2 is keeping my mind from things that lead me toward fear. This does not mean that I plan to be like an ostrich with my head in the sand oblivious to everything that is happening in the world. It means that I realize that I need to choose to filter what enters my mind and choose to think on the things that the Bible says that we should think on- things that are "true, noble, just, pure, lovely, of good report" (Phil 4:8). For me, these things do not include extensive media coverage of the JonBenet Ramsey case nor do they include psychological thriller/ suspense type movies or TV shows that highlight bizarre murders and crime. I have this replay button in my brain that I must consciously turn off in order to refuse to allow those images to surface, because, for me, they fuel fear. So, this week's meditation in the Word for me has been Psalm 91. I am commiting verse one to memory and plan to use it as my weapon against this mental war against worry and fear:


"He who dwells in the secret place of the Most High shall abide under the shadow of the Almighty. I will say of the Lord, 'He is my refuge and my fortress; My God, in Him I will trust'."

As you might have guessed, I am lacking in the fellowship area over here, so this post has been my attempt at accountability. These are books that I am currently reading that are helping me to gain a biblical perspective on fear: Living Faith by Helen Roseveare and The Mighty Hand of God by Dale Evrist

Well, after weeks of sweating because of the "cannicule"/ i.e. heatwave, we are now experiencing a very pleasant 64 degree day of nice breezes. It feels like fall, and it is such a nice change from the recent above 90 degree heat that we have been having. I know, ya'll are still in that above 90 heat, but there is a huge difference- You have air conditioning! You go from your air conditioned house to your air conditioned cars to air conditioned stores, workplaces, churches, etc. It is very different here. There are very few air conditioned homes. Most places of business are not air conditioned, with the exception of the grocery store and the inside part of malls (not the stores in the mall though). I could not escape from sweating all day long. I had to absolutely give up on drying my hair because I could not bear the heat. Appliances give off so much heat in my non-climatized house that I didn't use them much either. Sarah Adeline and I have been sitting around in the dark (no lights on- that gives off heat too) with the shutters closed (to keep out the sunlight which heats up the house) for weeks. I finally came to the conclusion that those last few pounds that I wanted to lose before going to the pool did not matter anyomore- we just needed to get wet to cool off! On the news they recommend going to an airconditioned place for at least 3 hours a day to get your body temp down, so we have been shopping alot- at the grocery store and in the center of malls. I was shocked to find out that the major dept store here does not have air conditioning. In fact, many French people get sick when they stay in air conditioned places. Don't ask me why, but I guess their systems just aren't as used to it as we Americans are. Anyway, I have bought 3 fans and 1 refraicheur d'air- it is this machine you plug in and put in water and ice packs that cool the air. I feel like a pioneer woman. I made homeade lemonade for the first time on Monday- out of necessity- you can't buy it here. Crazy, huh? Anyway, I have been making mac and cheese from scratch too since we've been here,and today I am making chicken and vegetable stock to use for cooking. Who am I turning into? I know- it sounds like June Cleaver, but to me it feels like Laura Ingalls. Help! I am coming home on Tuesday to the wonderful air conditioned US where there is Crystal Light and Kraft macaroni and cheese (although I think I prefer homeade) and cans of everything one needs to cook with. Hope to see you all soon!